A Mad-Lib Rejection Letter

As a new author, you will undoubtedly receive a rejection letter or two as you send your baby out into the wilderness to get sniffed, and sometimes eaten, by the wolves who lurk just beyond the trees. They're not really wolves, they simply receive such a high volume of submissions, that they can sometimes be quite terse in their response. This usually comes in the form of the long celebrated Form Rejection letter. If legend holds true, even the magical JK Rowling received a rejection letter or 20+ as she shopped poor Harry Potter's Sorcerer's Stone around. It happens. And since it happens, you might as well have some fun with it before you hunker down to actually fix the manuscript that failed to find a home.

At the behest of a fellow author, Portia Sisco I have Mad-Libbed a Form Rejection Letter. Enjoy.

Dear Chris,
Thank you for offering me the opportunity to STUFF your manuscript, QUIVER OF ARTEMIS. Unfortunately your RANCID story isn't for me. I REGURGITATED your first chapter and was impressed by your GORGEOUS use of words. Best of luck in future endeavors.

Sincerely,
The Editor

P.S. I apologize for the condition of your submission. My WOLVERINE YELLED at it, so it may be a little damp.

Caenus and Kalliste: A New Beginning

As most of you who follow me know, I am re-writing Caenus and The Quiver of Artemis. Hell, it may even have a new name by the time it's done. What it will also have is more intense action and more developed relationships. And... more romance. Oh, rest assured, it's still PG-13 on the romance front. But their love is more intense. (I do have an alter ego Scott Noir... but he's not touching this story!)

So in the spirit of Valentine's Day and all, I decided to reveal a bit of what I'm re-writing... a teaser if you will. To set it up: Caenus has already met his fire-haired love interest at the Isthmian Games, and felt the bite of her sharp tongue and indifference, as she is over and done with egotistical princes. A few days later, Caenus notices her at a festival and decides to charge the windmill yet again.
 

I present to you... Caenus... and Kalliste (posing as Adriande)

He approached the beauty, who ate with her friends from an over-sized fivefold cup offering wine, cheese, honey, bread, and olive oil. As he approached and opened his mouth to speak, she slowly turned to look at him. Her torch-lit emeralds cast a spell upon him and not a word escaped his parted lips. She smiled broadly, flattered as much by his genuine attraction as by his humility, a trait she found scarce in other young princes.

Her friends both looked at her with arched brows. After a pause, she nodded them away and turned back to the Iolkosian.

"Caenus... is it?"
"Yes M'lady." he fumbled nervously.
"Has my name took leave of you this quickly?"
"No, no, nooo... Adriande... see, I remembered."
"Pretty brave of you to punch that bull in the nose, eh? Were you not afraid of that terrible beast?"
"Survival calls for many tactics," he began. "W-w-wait a moment... you were watching that contest?"
"Yes, I saw a little..."
"What of the race yesterday... did you see that as well?"
"Not much to see really, except the beginning and end..."
"D-d-did you see the end?" he interjected, his voice pitched highly.
"Quite a finish, I must say," she smiled. "You may just win this thing, eh?"
"Well..." Caenus cast his eyes downward. "Makedon... he is a divine warrior it seems."

Adriande rolled her eyes, shifting them furtively from side to side. She paused, chewing her olive oil saturated bread end. After washing it down with a sip of wine, she spoke slowly, "I shall make you a deal. If you can best him... if you can win these games... I shall clasp your hand in marriage."

Caenus' heart stopped, rejecting fully what his ears knew he had heard. The only life he felt was the energy he absorbed from her eyes looking straight into his. The only air he breathed was the air she exhaled before his face. What she had said was that... he could win the crown of laurels, his father's respect, and the hand of the goddess before him? When his heart began again, a trickle of perspiration divided his brow.

"M'lady, I now ha..."
"Please... call me Adriande."
"Adriande... I now have more motivation than should be allowed a single man."
"Indeed you do."

A wry smile brought a twinkle to her eyes as she gazed deeply into his. Detecting no ego, no agenda, and no malice... none of the attributes so loathed in Makedon... she decided that if this goatherder could actually win the games, he would be well worth the trouble that was certain to come. His eyes had invited her into his unguarded core and held her captive. Who was she kidding... win or lose... she was his. He just did not know it yet.

"May the gods favor your victory, Caenus. Fare you well tomorrow." She lightly grazed his muscular upper arm and then turned to rejoin her friends.

Caenus barely breathed in the moments it took her to leave him. A warmth brewed in is soul, fire radiating outward in concentric rings. He had fallen headlong under her spell, yet he still knew frighteningly little about the mystery girl.

Where did she live? Who was her father? And how, as radiant as she looked, did she have no claims against her? Caenus sensed he was being led into a hornet's nest, but he cared not.

An Homage To "The Lightning Thief"

Let me just go ahead and say it... I AM ADDICTED TO MYTHOLOGY!! There I said it! I feel like I need to go to one of those meetings sometimes... You know the ones...
"Hello, my name is Chris and I'm a mythology addict."
"Hiiiiiiiiiiiiii Chris! You're among friends."

Seriously, I love all mythology: Roman, Greek, Norse, Celtic, Egyptian... you name it... I love it!

As you know, I am myself re-penning a young adult, Greek mythology based novel. And, so I am all about hyping and promoting the category of YA Mythology based novels. This is why I am sooooo excited to see Rick Riordan's masterpiece- Percy Jackson and The Olympians: The Lightning Thief- come to the big screen. It was an awesome read and I expect it to be an even awesomer movie! (Don't you worry, I know awesomer isn't a word... but sometimes it's fun to pretend ;-)

If you've lived under a rock recently, and aren't familiar with the book and story, here it is in a nutshell...
Set in modern day New York, young Percy Jackson discovers he is the demigod son of Poseidon, Greek God of the Sea. Together with a satyr and another demigod daughter of Athena, Percy embarks on an odyssey of sorts to recover Zeus' stolen thunderbolt. But can he find it in time to save the Gods of Olympus from going to war with each other?
Here's a redesigned cover of the book:

 

Here's the movie tie-in cover for the book:

So, like i said, the movie looks really exciting: Here's a link to the trailer:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vOZmpR6s6Fg

 I hope you all enjoy it as much as I will!! See you at the movies!